片段1
（这个片断有独立的下载地址。 点击这里下载。）
[MUSIC]
[MUSIC STOP]
PC: Hello I'm PC,[LAUGH] and I have a personal messege from Steve Jobs to all of you developers I'd like to deliver now, take the rest of the year off. That's right, take a long vovation, just relax us (?) big brains for a while. Steve and I are agree, we can go ahead and stop making seamless software that just works, let's let the Mac users experience compatiblilty problems and viruses and error messeges, that's Bill's charator. Instead, you should work your tens or maybe attend your campus pile(?), discover what makes you you. You know, your poetry, your art. if your want, you can help out on Vista, we could, we could use some help there.[LAUGH] And Steve says, that's fine. He doesn't like to see Microsoft so far behind. Oh and speaking of Vista, widgets, gadgets, completely different.[LAUGH] They're their own thing. Just like aqua, I mean er... Aero.[LAUGH] So, stop. No more anouncements, nothing. What ever else that you've been working on, you can just stop now. Steve and I are, (?) on this one, (?) way back, went to the big island together last spring, actually. Long walks on the beach, that (?) carry OK. It's quite hoot. I remember one night,...
Mac: What you doing PC, who are you talking to?
PC: Er... Just get ready for our... er ... next commercial. Miau, miau, miau...[LAUGH]
[Applause, Laugh, and Scream]
[Steve Jobs walk in， WWDC06 opens.]
......
（按：PC和Mac相信看过Apple TV ads的人都知道是谁。如果你还不知道，请看这里。）
[Steve Jobs] ... So this is we've been doing for the last five years. [Silent] What is our competitor 've been doing in last five years? Well, they've been trying to ship their single release that have many names, but is now called Vista. And to give you all thoughts on Vista, I'd like to bring up Bertrand Serlet.
片段3
（按，演讲者操着欧洲腔调的英语，实在听不懂，不过这种腔调特别适合做这种搞笑的讲演！）
[Bertrand Serlet] Two years ago, on WWDC, we thought we'd book a little bit firm at forcusing Redmond (?), who is still working on longhorn. So we hang the hall of the conference with the big banner, that's said, "Redmond, Stop Your Photocopiers."[Laugh] This was only joke but they actually took it seriously. [Laugh] Why I am thinking that? Well Lets look at the typical screenshot of tiger and what we see on the latest beta of Vista.[Laugh] Some similarities here.
（按：今年WWDC打出的标语是："Mac OS X Leopard, Introducing Vista 2.0" 和"Mac OS X Leopard, Hasta la Vista, Vista"第一句我就不说了，第二句是西班牙语，意为，回头见(Hasta la Vista)，Vista。）
片段4
Let's look at spotlight. Now we spotlight ...(?) it's easy to fine your information on your local disks and informations on the web. And we have this incredible technology under the hood... (一大段听不懂)... They (Vista) ... instead of having the manu on the top right, they put it on the bottom left. [Laugh]（按：此处的menu指的是Spotlight的搜索栏。）
片段5
...functionality, Safari RSS. Guess what? IE 7 RSS. They even have the same layout of the little kind of filter box on the right. Now talking of the similarly out...
片段6
...This is iCal, and this is windows calender.[Two Screenshot on the show. They look almost the same.] [Laugh] They even try to copy the color scheme. [Laugh]And didn't get that quite right.[Laugh]
Now we see the logo. You may think, we made that logo by standard Microsoft windows logo and adding a nice auqa bubble on top. No, that's the official logo. But you know, underneath it all, It's still windows.[Applause, Laugh]
[Laugh.]If you can't innovate, I guess you just immitate, but it's never quite as good as the original.[Applause, Laugh][按：此时，屏幕上展示了一个奇怪的小丑，虽然看不太清楚，但是那个小丑手脚长错位置，歪鼻子瞪眼的，喻指Vista拙劣的抄袭。]
So enough said about Vista. And Vista is still in the future of Windows customers, but for us it's features from our past. It features we've had in tiger, in pather, some things beginning of MacOS X and we've already (?) several times on these features. To talk about the future, our future, I'll go back to turn to Steve.
[Left the stage.]
后面还有长长的Leopard介绍。我就没有心情一段一段听写出来了。我的英语水平有限，上面的内容不保证准确，旨在提供一个大略的意思，但是依然力求和实际讲演一致。也许光看这些并不觉得很搞笑，但是要是你真的听了讲演，那就不同了。
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